Percy Jackson meets Twilight
by HellaHades
Summary: My evil randomness...be afraid...be very afraid...WARNING- PMS Cussing Stupidness Gayness Randomness


EDWARD- Looks dramatically to the sky…

PERCY- You know, you don't have to say everything you do.

EDWARD- That's what you think…Still looks dramatically into the sky…

(ANNABETH walks up)- He's kinda cute…

(PERCY in back round)- HEY!

(ZEUS materializes in front of them)- Hey I got a quest for all of you tonight!

(PERCY mutters)-Gay…

ZEUS- YOU SUCK!

EDWARD- Who the hell are you! Still looks dramatically at the gay guy…

(PERCY mutters louder)- Even more gay….

ZEUS- Well as you know, I'm am the Lord of the Sky! ZEUS! And I-

EDWARD- Wait! Like the Greek god Zeus? Does your wife have any powers? What's her name? Oh yeah! Hera, right? Looks at Zeus weirdly…

ZEUS- Well….Once a month, she becomes EVIL and I CANNOT defeat her! Our children run in terror! Our big dog hides under the couch!

(HADES appears)- You have a big dog?

ZEUS- Actually, I borrowed your Chihuahua….

(HADES gets angry)- Screw you! (Disappears after flipping off Zeus)

EMMETT- Oooh….Hades just served you!

ZEUS- I'm going to kill you!

EMMETT- You cant kill a vampire. (snickers)

(PERCY hears from behind him)- I'M GOING TO KILL YOU! (PERCY runs in terror)

(LUKE appears)

ANNABETH- That wasn't nice

(JACOB comes from behind bush.)- Team Jacob! If you come on my team I will give you a long kiss..

(EMMETT'S face lit up)- Team Jacobs lips here I come!

(JACOB and EMMETT start making out)

PERCY- Why does everybody have to be-

ANNABETH- GAY!

(THALIA falls from sky)- SCREW YOU DAD! (Lands with a f*****g hard fall next to ZEUS)

ZEUS- Hi, Honey Bunches!

EVERYONE except THALIA- Honey bunches….

THALIA- You suck *CENSORED FOR SAFTEY* and you can *CENSORED FOR SAFTEY* and ********************************************************************! And Dad! What did I tell you not to say?

ZEUS- (looks down ashamed) To not to call you honey bunches… (Disappears as he cries his eyes out)

LUKE- A little harsh don't you think?

THALIA- (Looks at LUKE surprised) WHO THE HELL PUT YOU IN THIS STORY! I WANT A REFUND!

PERCY- What the hell is actually the point of this story?

ANNABETH- TO GO AGAINST GAYNESS!

(Blue Pruis appears)- GET IN!

EMMETT- The Pruis talked!

JACOB and EDWARD- It's not the freakin' car!

EDWARD- It's Rosalie! And Jasper!

JASPER- GET IN NOW!

THALIA- I don't want to go in there!

LUKE and EMMETT- Why?

THAIIA- Have you heard that car go by? VROOOooommm I'm gay…when it stalls it goes humanahumanahumana….It is the most RETARDED and SORRY car!

(LUKE pulls her into car and PERCY, ANNABETH, EMMETT, JACOB, EDWARD, and a struggling THALIA get in)

RACHEL- Too much to freakin process… (head blows up)

RANDOM FANGIRLS- Percabeth forever!

(ANNABETH laughs)- Rachel's here.

LUKE- Where?

ANNABETH- Over there, down there, and up there.

PERCY- What are we supposed to be driving away from?

ROSALIE and JASPER- Fangirls….

THALIA- SCREW THE WRITER! THIS STORY MAKES NO SENSE!

ANNABETH- We're in a story?

ROSALIE- AHHHHH! (hits BELLA with car)

EDWARD- Bella! (sobs uncontrollably)

THALIA- Screw you bastards that was funny!

LUKE- You like to screw people don't you?

THALIA- It's in my job description as a daughter of Zeus…

(JACOB twitches, turns into wolf, and runs of with BELLA)

(EDWARD yells out window)- Don't use her as a chew toy this time! That's my job…

THALIA- Can we kill him….

(ROSALIE keeps driving)- AAHHH! TREE!

PERCY- GODS know when you'll learn to drive!

(Car crashes and everyone crawls out and watches it blow up)

(GROVER walks into field in which they crashed)

GROVER- You guy's all right?

JASPER- Satyr blood….

GROVER- What?

(JASPER chased GROVER down and made a blood milkshake)

PERCY- GROVER! (Holds back sob)

(JASPER walks over to PERCY)- I'm sorry….Did you want any?

PERCY- Guess what?

JASPER- What?

PERCY- SHUT UP!

THALIA- I'm sorry readers of this f*****g story….The writer was umm sugar high…. So some final words from me. SCREW YOU BASTARDS WHO DON'T REVIEW!

ANNABETH- What story?


End file.
